Today I saw something posted by George Takei, one of my favorite Star Trek actors, that made me think about my feelings on gay marriage. It is approximately 10 minutes long and is so tragic, and painful, to view. If you can handle the visible grief of another human being, it is well worth watching. I will admit, I almost didn't make it through this. It is difficult for me to watch the pain of others, but I wanted to see what this young man, Shane, had to say.
This couple, Tom and Shane, were obviously committed to one another. The fact that one family could not accept their love, is heartbreaking and tragic and their judgment may have led to this death. The fact that one of these young men could not even go to the funeral of his life partner, because he was threatened with violence is beyond appalling. It was obvious to me, that Tom and Shane loved each other. I loved that they laughed so much. Together. The fact that they are both male, is utterly beside the point, they loved each other. THEY. LOVED. EACH. OTHER. And my heart goes out to Shane at the loss of his partner and they way he was treated by Tom's family.
It seems to me the young man who died, Tom, had sadly misguided and misinformed and possibly embarrassed parents. For a family not to accept their son? To me as a parent, this is just so...I cannot imagine blaming my child for something beyond their control. I just can't. And now, this young man Tom, is gone. Lost to his family and his partner forever. With no chance at all of teaching his family he was normal and was in love a man.
And even more sadly to me, is that after his death, he was taken away from Shane, the one person who so obviously loved him.
I can only imagine the depth of the pain that Shane, who is surviving the loss of the man he loves, is dealing with. It was that pain that made me think hard about my ideas of marriage. My perceptions. What I believe about love. Relationships. I am trying to understand my reluctance to say out right, its okay to be gay and married. I have a lot of thinking to do. And I'm sorry, but I still don't know how I feel about gay marriage. But, I am now teetering on the fence, where as before I was firmly on the side of being ambivalent.
I do believe strongly that the rights of 'life partners' have been curtailed. I want these committed couples to have the same protections that I do, as a married woman. I believe that something must be done for people who love someone of the same sex and want to have a "legal in the eyes of the families, private entities and all levels of government" relationship.
Gay couples should have the freedom, at the very least, of some kind of civil union that allows their partner the same rights as hetero couples. Every one of us, as Americans should recognize those freedoms and rights, and we should NEVER allow anyone to limit or curtail the right of another person.
Not even if it is their own families who are the ones who are homophobic and or bigots...
Click on the link to view this video...It could happen to you
No comments:
Post a Comment